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I used to start my day drinking a hot cup of coffee while I sent birthday greetings to my friends on Social Media. Now there is something else that must be done before I can get to the fun stuff. I have to un-tag and delete posts from my timeline from people who wish to use me for my connections on Social Media. Many of these people I have never even met, yet they feel we have such a great connection that they can place their ads on my wall! This is not cool. In fact, it’s downright rude!
Think of a Facebook timeline like personal property. You wouldn’t even consider placing a sign in your neighbors’ yard advertising your business would you? Would you ever presume placing one of those magnetic signs on your friends’ car with your logo on it to be okay? Of course not! It’s overstepping the boundaries of friendship. It’s disregarding their personal property. Social Media property should be treated the same way. If you abuse my friendship, I have the option to unfriend you and quite often do just that when I feel I’m being used.
If you continually use people this way, you will develop a reputation that will not be flattering. You are actually even branding yourself with this behavior. Etiquette is simply about mutual respect. If you have respect toward others then you have good manners.
Your Brand = Your Manners
Not too long ago I was in negotiations with an individual who asked me to teach one of my classes at his office. I’ll just say that we did not agree on my fee and left things on a professional note. A few days later, he posted on my timeline that he wished I’d come down on my fee so I could teach at his office. I was appalled! Business negotiations do not belong on Facebook. He told me a lot about himself at that point and I am no longer interested in doing business with him on any level. Now every time I see him I think about that incident. In my mind, that indiscretion is his brand.
Remember, what you do on Social Media is there for all to see. Don’t get into a knock-down drag-out with someone. It’s not worth it! Don’t be negative all the time. Trust me, the sky is not always falling. There are plenty of positive things to talk about. People are judging you based on the decisions you make and the posts you share. Make sure you are building the brand that you want to be known for and not one where people want to hide and escape from you.
What is okay to place on someone else’s timeline? Birthday wishes are awesome. It’s celebrating the other person and letting them know you care and celebrate them on their special day. If we’ve taken a photo together, please tag me in the photo. If you are saying something nice about me, please tag me! If you are recommending my business or service, tag away! I’ll be your friend forever! Do you get the theme here? When it’s only about you and your business, it only belongs on your wall/ timeline. When it’s about me or us, yes, I’m thrilled that you have thought of me.
The Golden Rule is timeless and applies to all we do, even on Social Media;
“Do unto to others as you would have them do unto you.”
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When I first started out on my own, things didn’t look good for me. I was newly divorced, had no resume or degree, and had spent the last 23 years as a wife, mom and volunteer. I had to figure out a way to support myself. I wanted to be an entrepreneur because I realized that I didn’t have much to offer corporate America. I was pretty beaten down. I believed that I lacked basic skills and had no training or anything valuable to offer. I knew I had a lot to learn but I wanted to try anyway. In fact, I felt compelled to try. There were many people that suggested to me that I go get a job. But I continued on with my dream to work for myself. I refused to give up.
It hasn’t been an easy journey. I realize that going through a divorce isn’t the worst thing that can happen but it was rough. One of my saddest days was when I realized that I couldn’t afford the gym membership that had, in a way, kept me sane the last few months as my life was being rearranged into a drama filled, unpredictable mess. Going to the gym seems like it’s a small thing but I can tell you that to me, it was a big deal. I desperately needed the emotional and physical outlet that the Y gave me. I could go there and remove myself from the drama for an hour or so and just let go. The camaraderie, love, empowerment and encouragement that I got there kept me going on many days.
On this journey there were days that were so hard that I couldn’t even talk about it to my family and friends. Times when I cried on my knees asking God to help me figure out how I was going to support myself. I went through every penny of savings just trying to not lose my house before I could get it sold. I needed to get the equity out of the house, which would help get me going in business. But if I lost the house, I was doomed. This was during the downturn of the Real Estate market. If it weren’t for an incredible friend, I would have lost my house before I could sell it. When the house did finally sell, I was down to my last $300. It has truly been a miraculous journey.
With sadness, I bravely approached the sweet lady at the check-in desk and told her I needed to cancel my membership. She very gently asked me why. As I explained, I know she saw the tears in my eyes even though I was doing my best to conceal them with sunglasses. She explained to me that the Y had a scholarship program for people like me. They have an annual fundraising partners campaign every year and people in the community selflessly give so people like me can experience all that the Y has to offer. I have been blessed to be a recipient of this program and I am abundantly grateful to all those that have given to this.
But today, I gave! It was the first time that I was in a position where I could be the one giving back. Amen and Amen! What an empowering feeling it was to put my money in that box so I could be a blessing to someone else. I can’t even put into words how good that felt for me.
After over six years of pushing and persevering, my business is growing and things look so much better for me. I finally feel like I really can do this and that maybe I wasn’t crazy for trying.
As I experience more success, and every step no matter how small is success, there are a few people who now see me as someone to tear down. I’m sure none of them saw the struggle that has brought me here. They only see me as a competitor and want me stifled. I don’t desire success at the expense of someone else. There is room for all of us to succeed. Success is infinite!
We can never see or understand someone else’s journey. We have all struggled at some point with different things. We needn’t tear each other down. Give instead. Help each other up. Be the kind of person who encourages and celebrates the success of others. If you are struggling, then accept help. Allow others to bless you. If you are able to give, then be a blessing. When you do that, you set into motion such good will that it will come back to you many times over.
If you would like to give as well, you can do so HERE. 🙂
#YMCA #KatyY #GiveBack #Empowerment #GreenTeam #BodyCombat #Yoga #BodyPump #Love
FENG – The Financial Executive Networking Group
Lunch included | 3-hour credit | No Late Arrivals!
Taught by Kathryn C. Wheat